Embracing Imperfection

Parenting is an extraordinary journey filled with countless joys, but let's be honest—it’s also a whirlwind of challenges and chaos. Amidst the hustle and bustle, it's easy to get caught up in the small stuff, letting minor hiccups stress me out. But here's the thing: stressing over the small stuff doesn't help anyone, least of all ourselves or our kids. This blog is my sanctuary, a place where I unload my thoughts and worries, allowing me to see my "problems" or "issues" from a fresh perspective.

I am a work in progress. This phrase has become my mantra, reminding me that it's okay not to have everything figured out. Parenting is a continuous learning process, and every day brings new lessons. Sometimes, I find myself getting overwhelmed by the never-ending to-do lists, the sibling squabbles, the pre-puberty battles, and the myriad of other minor stressors that come with raising a large family.

Writing this blog helps me process these feelings. It’s therapeutic, allowing me to step back, detach,  and analyze my reactions. More often than not, I realize that what seemed like a big deal in the moment was actually quite trivial. This realization helps me approach similar situations with a calmer mindset in the future…sometimes.

Amongst the chaos of parenting five kids, it's crucial to keep a level head. This isn’t just for my own sanity, but also because I want to model healthy coping mechanisms for my children. They look up to me and learn from my behavior. If I react to stress with panic or anger, they might think that's the appropriate way to handle pressure. I’ve really had to practice this.

I strive to show them that it’s possible to stay calm and composed, even when things don’t go as planned. When a glass of juice spills or a toy gets broken, I try to take a deep breath and handle the situation with patience. This doesn’t mean I’m perfect—far from it. But every small step towards being more patient and understanding is a step in the right direction.

One of the biggest lessons I’ve learned is the importance of being in the moment. Also something I’m working on. With five kids, life moves fast, and it’s easy to get lost in the chaos. But when I take the time to be present, to really engage with my children and appreciate the little moments, everything else seems to fall into place.

Being in the moment means putting down my phone, ignoring the mess, and truly listening to my kids. It’s about finding joy in their laughter, being there for their tears, and celebrating their successes, no matter how small. These are the moments that matter, the ones that make all the stress worthwhile.

Teaching kids how to handle pressure is something I feel like we’ve drawn away from. I don’t know the when it happened but this is why it’s my goal to have my kids do hard things. To experience that pressure and know how to respond. When they see me respond to a stressful situation with calmness and clarity, they learn to do the same. This doesn’t mean suppressing my emotions; it’s about managing them in a healthy way.

For example, when my child comes to me with a problem, I try to listen actively and offer support without immediately jumping to solve it for them. This teaches them problem-solving skills and resilience. By staying calm and composed, I can help them navigate their emotions and find solutions on their own.

Parenting is a beautiful mess. It’s a journey filled with ups and downs, laughter and tears, chaos and calm. As I continue to navigate this journey, I remind myself that it's okay to be a work in progress. By sharing my thoughts and experiences here, I hope to gain new insights and perspectives, and maybe even help others who are on a similar path.

So, here’s to not sweating the small stuff, to embracing imperfection, and to being present in the moment. Let’s teach our kids that it’s okay to be imperfect, and that handling pressure with grace and patience is a skill worth cultivating. After all, it’s the little moments that make the biggest impact.