A Heartfelt Journey

Life has a way of throwing unexpected challenges our way, and sometimes, the path we envision for ourselves takes unexpected turns. For Tara and me, one of those turns came when we became guardians of our niece, Maya, after her mother passed away. Our family of six quickly grew to seven, bringing a whirlwind of emotions, responsibilities, and difficult decisions.

The two years that followed were some of the most challenging we had ever faced. We welcomed Maya into our home with open arms, determined to provide her with the love and support she needed. But as time went on, it became clear that despite our best efforts, Maya was not making the progress we had hoped for; in fact, we were met with many regressions.

We tried everything we could think of to help get Maya on track. We managed to get her into an amazing school program designed to meet her needs and teach daily living skills. We secured in-home services to continue the progression of her skills, hoping to create more independence. We also ensured she was on the right medication to manage her seizures, which had been taking a toll on her. These steps brought some improvements, but they weren't enough. Maya needed more than what we could provide, and this realization was heartbreaking.

The decision to relinquish our guardianship was one of the hardest choices Tara and I have ever made. We felt an immense amount of guilt. What were we doing wrong? Why couldn’t we provide the support that Maya needed to progress? Was it us, our home? So many questions, variables, and internal battles plagued us. Not only was Maya not making progress with us, but we believe our household was just too overstimulating for her. This is a girl who was an only child for nine years of her life, then suddenly found herself in a large family, a new home, and a new environment. On top of that, she started having severe seizures, going through puberty, and was put on a variety of medications.

There were days I was by myself caring for all five kids, and it was tough. Having to rely on our oldest, Collins, to help care for her siblings and be ready to call 9-1-1 when Maya was having a severe seizure is not something an 11-year-old should do, but that’s what we needed to do. We all cared deeply for Maya, and in our hearts, we knew that this decision was in Maya's and our family’s best interest.

It took some time to realize that relinquishing guardianship didn't mean we were giving up on Maya. Instead, it meant recognizing our limitations and ensuring she received the care and support she needed from someone better equipped to provide it. We appointed a new guardian who could offer Maya the environment and resources necessary for her growth and well-being.

Looking back, those two years were a period of immense growth for all of us. We learned the true meaning of love and sacrifice and the importance of making decisions that prioritize the well-being of a loved one, even when it hurts. Maya remains a cherished part of our family, and we continue to support her in every way we can.

Our journey with Maya taught us that sometimes, love means letting go. It means making tough decisions and putting the needs of others before our own desires. And while the guilt and sadness may never fully fade, we take comfort in knowing that we did what was best for Maya.

To all those facing similar challenges, remember that seeking help and making difficult decisions is a testament to your strength and care. Our story is just one among many, and we hope it serves as a reminder that even in the face of tough choices, doing what's best is always the right path.